How to Teach Your Child to Write a Holiday Wishlist That Isn't Never-Ending

The good news is that this is completely normal, especially if your child is young. Even better, creating a holiday wishlist is more than just a game or seasonal routine. It’s a skill that can be developed.

It helps your child learn to understand their desires, differentiate between what's important and what's fleeting, and even show consideration for others.

Let's explore how this works and share concrete tips that you can start applying as early as tomorrow.

Wishlist — More Than Just a List of Wishes

At first glance, it may seem like making a wishlist is just a matter of listing items a child likes, but in reality, they are:

• learning to articulate their desires — up to a certain age, children often struggle to clearly explain what they want, leaving parents to use their imagination or choose gifts themselves. By creating a wishlist, children learn to describe their wishes with words: naming, specifying, explaining. They start to realize the difference between "I want this because I saw it once" and "I actually need this." The ability to articulate desires is a skill that later helps in life: in communication, learning, career choices, and even personal relationships;
• learning to prioritize — if a child wants 15 different toys but is asked to pick only one, they face a new challenge: What is most important to me right now? This is the skill of prioritization — a key component of critical thinking. The ability to identify what's essential among many options, to forgo less vital items for something more valuable, is a critical life skill that doesn't develop overnight. Children whose parents assist them in mastering this process adapt more easily to school tasks, better plan their time, and make decisions more easily in stressful situations;
• beginning to understand that not all wishes are instantly fulfilled — when a child makes a wishlist, they gradually learn that even if they want something, they might not get it right away or at all. This crucial understanding teaches how to cope with the disappointment of unmet wishes and avoids meltdowns about it. They begin to understand that the world is more complex than just "want — get" and that others also have desires and limited resources. Plus, waiting increases the value of a gift. This is a step toward emotional maturity, and yes, adults often struggle with this too;
• developing mindfulness — writing a wishlist is an excellent practice in mindfulness. Children get a chance to learn to understand what they truly feel and need — without tantrums or pressure. It’s essentially the first steps toward developing emotional intelligence.

Why Do Kids Want Everything at Once?

When a child writes a letter to Santa, they often list everything they've ever seen or heard: toy cars, building sets, a giant plush bear, a robot dog, a treehouse, and another dozen random things. It's not greed or poor upbringing. There are very understandable reasons behind it — all related to age, experience, and the environment they live in.

• The child’s brain can't make choices yet. At this age, a child's brain is still developing, especially the part responsible for self-control, planning, and decision-making. Because of this, kids can't immediately decide what they really need and what is just a fleeting thought. They can't set priorities. When an adult can say, "I want a new phone, but I'll wait until summer," a child will say, "I want everything and now!" — and be absolutely convinced that every wish is equally important. It's not a whim; it's just a developmental stage. Making choices requires practice. And each wishlist is that practice, so it's best to do it beyond just the holiday season.
• Children live in a stream of temptations they don't know how to filter. Modern kids encounter a vast amount of visual and advertising stimuli from an early age. They see ads on social media and TV, toys with influencers, colorful packaging in stores, and new cool things with friends at preschool or school. Each of these impressions leaves a trace — an unfulfilled desire. But unlike adults, children don’t yet know how to separate fleeting impulses from true desires. They see it — they want it. They see something new — they change their mind. And it goes on. Until this filter develops, their wishes jump from one to the next.
• Adults do the same — just differently. If you think your child is being unreasonable, remember how some people buy things on sale. A huge number of options, discounts, promotions — and suddenly choosing between two nearly identical items becomes hard, leading to purchasing both. When faced with too many choices, people can lose the ability to make rational decisions. Kids experience the same. Thus, when they make a 20-item wishlist — it's not greed, but a natural reaction to being overwhelmed by desires and impressions.

How to Help Your Child Create a Mindful Wishlist?

Here are proven strategies. Try one or all of them. Preferably in a playful manner.

• Limit the number of wishes to three. A child's brain can't yet rank one desire over another. But if you suggest choosing only three most important wishes, they'll start to think: what do I want more, what will be useful longer, what will bring more joy? This is the forming of priorities — an important step that will be useful for more than just the holidays, but also in adult life when deciding between two jobs or planning a vacation.

• Divide wishes into categories. When a child sits down to write a letter to Santa, they often simply recall everything that delighted them in recent months. The list becomes long and chaotic. To help organize thoughts, suggest a simple structure: three categories of wishes. This makes the task easier and encourages thinking beyond themselves.

Categorizing helps children organize their thoughts and separate mere whims from genuine desires. It’s also helpful for parents, as such a list makes it easier to understand what truly matters versus what was added "just because."

• Ask your child to write a letter as Santa. Play Secret Santa through the MySanta service. The game can be organized in a few minutes. Your child becomes Santa for their recipient and starts choosing gifts based on the recipient's wishlist. This will spark thought-provoking questions: Why does my recipient want this? Why do they deserve their gift? Why will it feel good to surprise them? Which surprise from the list will delight my recipient the most?

Try Organizing a Secret Santa Game

Play at work and home, with family and friends. The game works offline when everyone is close and for online draws if loved ones are far away.

Try It Out

This helps develop empathy in children. It's particularly beneficial for kids ages 5–9, who are developing their ability to understand others' feelings and desires.

What to Do If Your Child Still Struggles to Choose?

Here are a few additional ideas if the list is a struggle to trim down:

• Create wish cards — write each wish on a separate card and arrange them together by importance. This makes it visually clearer what they want more and what less;
• Discuss last year's holiday gifts — ask your child what gifts truly delighted them last year and which were forgotten after a couple of days. Conduct an inventory of their room during clean-up to visualize priorities in toys and activities;
• Don’t devalue but offer alternatives — sometimes the entire wishlist can be stretched across other holidays for extended enjoyment, or instead of several inexpensive items, propose one quality gift;
• Use time limits — suggest that your child decide within 5 or 10 minutes. This will help them focus on the most desired gifts.

A wishlist is not just a gift list. It’s a way to understand oneself, develop emotional intelligence, and learn to think beyond oneself.

Each holiday season is a great opportunity to show your child that miracles happen not only when you receive but also when you choose wisely.

With each passing year, these letters become more meaningful. And parents become more at ease.