How to Do Secret Santa with a Mixed-Age Family (kids, grandparents)

This article gives some tips on making the Secret Santa experience appealing to children, parents, and grandparents. A few simple tips can help make it stress-free.

Why Secret Santa Works Well for Families

Secret Santa is a heartfelt tradition that creates lasting memories for everyone. It is easy to play and does not take a lot of time. However, experiences might differ depending on who is playing.

For children, it's exciting because of the novelty, the unexpectedness, and the need to wait for the surprise. Parents may find it entertaining — they may spend a lot of time selecting great gifts for everyone. Grandparents might find it interesting, as they can show their love for their children and grandchildren through giving something meaningful.

So how do you make Secret Santa work for a family that spans multiple generations? With a little thought and some simple strategies, you can create an experience that delights children, keeps parents excited, and brings joy to grandparents. Let's explore strategies for making Secret Santa more enjoyable for everyone by avoiding common difficulties.

Keep the Budget Kid-Friendly

Money can be a serious issue when organizing a Secret Santa event. If it is not a problem for parents, it can be overwhelming for kids and grandchildren to find money for gifts. Setting a budget that works for all parties involved is a good way to solve the problem.

Choose a budget

Discuss with the members of the family what budget works well for every participant. You can sponsor your kids and give them more pocket money for the valuable gifts. Usually, families agree on the sum, which varies from $10–$20.

Consider DIY options

Secret Santa can be not only about spending money on purchased goods, but also about handmade items. These gifts may include:

• Crafts, drawings, ornaments, and knitted items make great Secret Santa gifts. Handmade gifts add a personal touch and demonstrate the thought that went into them. Small DIY creations can be memorable. For children, you can make knitted toys or bright bracelets. Parents might appreciate a hand-painted cup and a knitted scarf. Grandparents would love a photo frame with hand decoration and a set of bookmarks for their favorite books.
• Baked treats. Home-made cookies, brownies, or gingerbread make perfect Secret Santa gifts. They create a festive mood and add a personal touch to the exchange. You could also give baked goods paired with a small homemade creation. 
• Coupons for small favours. These little promises can feel more meaningful than store-bought gifts, since they create shared moments and happy memories. They also ensure a happy and quality time together.

These solutions are great for children and grandchildren, as their budgets are often limited. Such gifts require effort and time invested in them, and can be more appreciated than purchased items.

Read more:

Why Giving Gifts Feels Better Than Receiving Them

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Include Grandparents

Grandparents might react differently to an invitation to play "Secret Santa". While some may be reluctant to try something new, others might be intrigued by the idea of becoming a participant and preparing great gifts for their families. If grandparents don't want to participate in the game, some phrases might encourage them to join in:

1. This will be fun for you — no pressure, and keep gifts simple.
2. We are keeping the budget small, so don’t worry about the expense.
3. Handmade gifts will be perfect for us.
4. Your presence is already a gift, but if you take part in the exchange, it will be even better!
5. Kids will love to see you as part of the game!

Even if grandparents don’t agree to take part in the game this year, they might observe the tradition, get inspired, and join next year. It is important to make Secret Santa enjoyable for them too, so prepare the gifts that might be useful for them.

When grandparents prepare gifts for others, they might rely on their wishlists. Also, other family members would love some handmade things from grandparents, like knitted socks and scarves. These gifts carry a personal touch that can’t be bought in a store and often become cherished keepsakes. Even a small handmade item feels extra special because it reflects time, care, and tradition.

Add Fun Twists and Variations

Adding a creative twist every year makes the game more exciting. Each variation should be magical for kids and meaningful for parents and grandparents. The challenge is to make it suitable for everyone involved.

Here are some appropriate ideas for all the family members:

• A Cozy Christmas. This theme includes cute gifts, like fluffy slippers, hot chocolate kits, plush toys for kids, scented candles for parents, and baked treats for grandparents. 
• A DIY Christmas. Such a Christmas helps kids become more creative and express themselves freely. Parents might enjoy joining in and helping kids with some issues they can’t cope with. Grandparents can express their love by creating something special for their family.

Such gifts may include hand-painted ornaments, decorated cookies with some special family-related items, personalized photo frames, and customized bookmarks.

A study on Biological Diversity found that 68% of Americans are likely to make a handmade or DIY gift during the holiday season.

• Storytelling exchange. Each participant prepares a funny story to tell in front of the family. This can be a shared memory, a fairytale, or another story connected with warmth, holiday, and joy.
• Experience Christmas. Instead of physical gifts, family members can make up experiences that they can organize themselves. For example, a baking day or a craft afternoon. To do this, prepare a simple kit with the key ingredients or supplies, plus a handwritten “invitation” for a fun family session. Choose recipes or projects that are easy for kids, manageable for parents, and enjoyable for grandparents, such as decorating cookies or making ornaments. The real gift is the shared experience — laughter, creativity, and memories made together.

Read more:

I Was Invited to Secret Santa. What Do I Do Next?

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Solve Common Issues

Some challenges are unavoidable even with careful planning. Here are some situations that can occur and ways to solve them:

1. Someone forgets their gifts. Prepare some small gifts and treats in case of such unforeseen circumstances. This ensures no one feels left out and experiences unpleasant emotions. The exchange stays stress-free.
2. Budget differences. Sometimes, family members cannot spend the same amount of money. Remember that thoughtfulness and creativity are greatly appreciated.
3. The challenge of choosing a gift. It may be difficult for participants to choose the right one, especially if they seem to have everything. To help with this task, participants can provide hints on their wishlists, indicating their preferences and desired colours.

To make the process even easier, you can use a Secret Santa application with built-in gift preferences. It is especially easy to do this with a free online Secret Santa tool like the MySanta app. Here, everyone fills in a short profile with their likes, hobbies, or practical needs. People can rely on their gift recipients' wishlists and choose or create a suitable gift. Kids and grandchildren might have difficulty with an online application, but with assistance, the problem can be resolved. Show them step-by-step how to use the application so that they only have a positive experience when playing.

In the MySanta app, each participant is matched with someone to give a gift to, while their identity remains hidden until the exchange. On the day of the exchange, play music and capture photos and videos to commemorate this special family moment.

Try our MySanta app

You can create wishlists, add exclusions, and communicate with your gifree secretly. Moreover, there is an option to track gifts and ensure that everyone buys a present on time.

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