How to Resolve Workplace Conflicts Before the Holiday Party
According to recent studies, one in every five employees in the US faces workplace conflicts, and almost one in six experiences issues with management.
According to recent industry research, nearly half of employees engage in disputes every month, with only 8% claiming they've never encountered internal conflicts.
Imagine the holiday party is fast approaching, and tensions are high in the office—people working together barely talk, marketers and sales teams seem to speak different languages, and some hold grudges against management. How can you bring everyone together at a celebration when underlying tensions and grievances linger?
There is a solution. Even if conflicts have been brewing for months, it is possible to foster a positive atmosphere before the party. This way, the celebration can serve as a reset point rather than a continuation of workplace drama.
Why You Should Resolve Conflicts Before the Holidays
If there is tension in the workplace, a holiday party might amplify them rather than ease. Psychologists refer to this as the emotional contagion effect—negativity naturally spreads and multiplies within a group like a virus. During a festive event, this can happen especially quickly.
Any unresolved disputes decrease satisfaction and make group activities unpleasant. You might have experienced this yourself: even in a seemingly cheerful atmosphere, if you're sitting next to people with whom you have disagreements, even anticipated treats lose their taste.
A holiday party acts as a magnifying glass for colleague relationships. If there is a friendly atmosphere among team members, the celebration will strengthen bonds. However, hidden grudges will surface and exacerbate tensions if resentment lingers.
And here's another important point—economic impact. Nationwide, employees spend $359B for time employees spend engaging in conflicts. On a company-wide scale, this leads to significant costs, and on a national scale, it results in billions of lost revenue annually. Thus, conflicts harm not only emotions but also tangible results.
Team conflicts affect motivation. When the work atmosphere is mainly negative, people lose engagement and think more about leaving. A negative psychological climate is directly linked to increased staff turnover, especially noticeable during the holiday season. Instead of wanting to develop, employees feel the weight of accumulated fatigue.
Therefore, an event where tension has built up risks becoming a catalyst for grievances rather than a unifying moment. However, by smoothing out tensions in advance, you can turn the party into a powerful tool for restoring the atmosphere and strengthening team spirit.
Who Should Handle Conflicts at Work
When a conflict arises in the workplace, it can be unclear who should intervene and resolve it. Is it the HR's responsibility? The manager's? Or should we hope colleagues will resolve it themselves?
Let's explore the roles and tools that effectively smooth out disputes in American companies.
HR professionals aren't just responsible for hiring. Their job scope is much broader. They ensure the company atmosphere and how individuals interact, which includes preventing and resolving conflicts. For example, an HR director might mediate between departments, managers, and employees and ensure that respectful communication and corporate ethics are maintained.
HR Business Partner is an HR professional who works not only with hiring but also with internal interactions, helping departments collaborate and resolving conflicts. This role is more common in large companies but is usually covered by an HR manager or personnel director in smaller firms.
Trustworthy colleagues—conflicts can also be resolved not just by HR or managers but by those particularly trusted within the team. This might be a senior specialist, team leader, or another respected individual. Their value lies in offering solutions during tough situations and maintaining a positive team spirit, as their opinions are often respected.
Corporate trust hotline—an anonymous way to report internal company issues—ethics violations, corruption, discrimination, conflicts of interest. It's not for psychological help but to safely and confidentially address such situations.
Many large American companies have these lines:
- JPMorgan Chase—The largest financial institution offers a trust line for reporting corruption and corporate ethics violations. Reports can be submitted via phone, email, or a special feedback form.
- Verizon—Offers a 24/7 ethics line. All submissions are anonymous, and the privacy of complainers and independent checks of problems are guaranteed. They can be reached via email, website form, or app.
- Wells Fargo—Runs the We Care ethics line, where employees can report issues anonymously. It's a practical tool for honest discussions and finding solutions, accessible through their official initiative page.
Solving conflicts independently. Where colleagues can discuss disagreements without mediators, there are fewer grievances, and stability is enhanced. It's crucial to understand different scenarios: disagreements on tasks, communication misunderstandings, or project approaches can usually be resolved independently. But when it involves personal insults, pressure, or open hostility, mediators like HR or managers are necessary to resolve these issues in confidence and trust.
How to Resolve Conflicts Effectively
When a conflict flares up in the office, there can be a temptation to point fingers—assign blame, offer advice. But this approach generally exacerbates conflicts, leaving those involved feeling humiliated and fostering resentment.
Effective strategies rely on tested methods: speaking honestly yet respectfully, focusing on the issue, not personalities, showing a willingness to listen without blaming. These simple techniques are based on studies of communication psychology—and they work specifically because they preserve everyone's dignity. Let's delve deeper:
- Speak from the first-person perspective. If you start by saying something like "You did it wrong, it's your fault," the person will perceive it as an attack and become defensive. The conversation will evolve from collaboration into a sparring match. If instead, you express from your perspective, it eases the tension. Say: "I'm concerned because we are behind schedule." Your counterpart will engage emotionally, leading to a constructive dialogue: "I understand. What can we do to fix this?"
- Don't let someone lose face. In workplace conflicts, it's crucial not to put the other person in a humiliating position. If they feel embarrassed or disrespected, they'll stop listening and start defending themselves. By maintaining their dignity, you facilitate dialogue and positive resolution opportunities.
- Start with a face-to-face conversation. Discuss the problem privately, not in a corridor or meeting. A calm setting encourages open conversation without the fear of seeming foolish or blameworthy in front of others. Focus on the disagreement's core without needing to maintain a public face.
- Focus on the task, not the person. Criticizing personalities triggers defense. But discussing the task opens the way for collaboration by identifying the problem without assigning blame.
- Listen before you speak. People are more likely to cooperate when they feel heard. This approach helps resolve conflicts quickly while maintaining good relationships. In conflicts, seek allies and partners, not just fault or guilt.
- Listen to all sides. Usually, every party has a valid perspective. Such discussions can turn into beneficial experiences, helping everyone understand the situation better and strategize future actions more effectively.
- Offer solutions. Complaints dwell on the past, but solutions guide toward the future. Collective problem-solving sets a mutual direction, gradually easing tensions so you can enjoy a drama-free holiday celebration.
Preventing Conflicts at Work
Smoothing conflicts before the holiday party is essential, but it's even better when the corporate culture itself minimizes tension before conflicts arise. Simple techniques promote peace and kindness:
- Clear communication rules. Pre-emptively agree that disputes are addressed privately, not publicly. This method saves stress for potential participants and those observing the conflicts.
- Shared traditions. Dining out on Fridays, open gratitude practices, and other small traditions foster a sense of belonging within the team. Pre-holiday traditions like organizing the Secret Santa game on the My Santa platform help ensure friendly communication in the group leading up to the party.
- Respect personal boundaries. Many conflicts begin when employees are compelled to participate in activities outside their duties—such as corporate contests, team-building activities, after-hours socialization, or evening chat activities. Forcing participation breeds resentment and hidden grievances. Expressing expectations upfront while allowing choices is essential. This approach respects personal time and different colleague temperaments, rather than demonstrating indulgence or work avoidance.
Conflicts can occur in any team, and they can't be eliminated entirely. However, they can be managed respectfully, without harsh words or actions and with a focus on the company's successful future. When this is achieved, the holiday party can become a genuine opportunity to connect.
